I’d first like to thank Mr. Ted Bell for temporarily yielding this space to me. Very kind of him. What I have to say is necessary…..and urgent. It’s urgent because I believe an individual under the guise of some kind of new-age, holistic persona is actively promoting a racist agenda using, of all things……mice. Small mice that he has under lock and key in a pet shop. These mice I am told are ostensibly for sale to further the good works of the the new-age, yoga, mumbo-jumbo movement and what have you. Now…I got no quarrel with the way a man chooses to make a living, no quarrel at all. But I’ve got one BIG quarrel with that man when he trains animals to spout viscious hate and I certainly have a BIG quarrel with that man when he trains MICE to spout that racist HATE.
Now hold on and don’t judge me til you’ve got the facts. I’m all about facts. You can doodly-do and and BS and so forth all the live long day but when that day ends and the cows are in the barn and the chickens are parked on their eggs…FACTS are all that matter. Last night….on the Phil Hendrie Show…a man I know well and on whose program I have often been….Mr. Hendrie had as a guest a man named Wheeler, Dean Wheeler, some kind of yoga guru and what not. He was calling from Novato, California which is northern California. Northern California has been the birth place to some wonderfully enlightened movements. It was in nothern California that the torch light opposing war shone bright. It was in northern California that the torch light opposing racism and sexism shone bright. And so why is it that on the night northern California betrays the residence of some jive, race-baiting yoga boy I am listening? I believe the answer is simple and the answer has always been the same. I was directed by GOD…………………………….to be listening last night.
I was listening last night when I heard Mr. Wheeler claim two mice, chirping away in the background of his phone convesation with Mr. Hendrie, were “talking” or chirping about him. I was listening when this man claimed the mice were “saying” insulting things about him, up to and including the insult that Mr. Wheeler dropped out of their “rear-ends”..(and here’s the good part)…and needed to be carted off to their “dung-field.” Mr. Wheeler claimed to Mr. Hendrie that “Mouse” was a form of communication used by mice but that it was not a language, per se. At this point I called the program to get on the air and dispute what Wheeler was saying, believing that he was mentally diseased! That is to say, I had PITY……………..for this fool. PITY………………..for this balled up clown.You can well imagine my heart going out to a poor, no-count nut that says he understands “mouse.”
Well I got on the air. And that’s when, as we say, all bets were off. As I began to question Wheeler I heard the suddenly agitated squealing of the mice. They were clearly chirping and squeeking or whatever on God’s good green earth you call it at a more pronounced pitch. My presence, it would seem, was agitating them. And then Wheeler dropped it. Those so-called mice had heard me on the line and were telling each other or the other mice or whoever was there that a n***** was on the line! Wheeler made this claim to me and at that point I had no reason to doubt him. I HAD thought he was unhinged. Now I know he runs some kind of animal act where he’s able to communicate with the creatures and slowly indoctrinate them into a racist, white supremist point of view.
Do I sound crazy? I got news for you. I will travel to northern California and speak directly with Mr. Wheeler about my observations. And unless he is able to give me a clearer understanding of why his mice said “a tired old n*****’s on the line” when they heard me on the Phil Hendrie Show last night I will go back out to my car, get the meat-tenderizing mallet I plan on bringing with me and go to work on his mice.
Pastor Rennick Notes: For a former fat lady Wendy Williams has worked miracles. Except for the nose-job. Also, those large breasts only serve to create resentment in the hearts of the smiling ladies in her audience. Deep inside, they hate them and her.