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Search Results for: Ted Bell – Page 65

It’s Elcott……the Next Step!… Dr. Ed Elcott brings on special guests Beans Halberstam and Bobbie and Steve Dooley. The Overlords are not happy.

It’s Elcott……the Next Step!… Dr. Ed Elcott brings on special guests Beans Halberstam and Bobbie and Steve Dooley. The Overlords are not happy.

It’s Elcott……the Next Step!… Dr. Ed Elcott brings on special guests Beans Halberstam and Bobbie and Steve Dooley. The Overlords are not happy.

It’s Elcott……the Next Step!… Dr. Ed Elcott brings on special guests Beans Halberstam and Bobbie and Steve Dooley. The Overlords are not happy.

It’s Elcott……the Next Step!… Dr. Ed Elcott brings on special guests Beans Halberstam and Bobbie and Steve Dooley. The Overlords are not happy.

It’s Elcott……the Next Step!… Dr. Ed Elcott brings on special guests Beans Halberstam and Bobbie and Steve Dooley. The Overlords are not happy.

It’s Elcott……the Next Step!… Dr. Ed Elcott brings on special guests Beans Halberstam and Bobbie and Steve Dooley. The Overlords are not happy.

It’s Elcott……the Next Step!… Dr. Ed Elcott brings on special guests Beans Halberstam and Bobbie and Steve Dooley. The Overlords are not happy.

It’s Elcott……the Next Step!… Dr. Ed Elcott brings on special guests Beans Halberstam and Bobbie and Steve Dooley. The Overlords are not happy.

It’s Elcott……the Next Step!… Dr. Ed Elcott brings on special guests Beans Halberstam and Bobbie and Steve Dooley. The Overlords are not happy.

Hour One:Cowboy Jim opens up with special guest Phil Hendrie who tells the kids he blew off a meeting with Comedy Central because they're thieves. The Ted Bell comes on to tell Phil he's blowing it not showing up for meetings with heavy cable networks. Phil waxes eloquent about how he and Maria celebrated their 8th wedding anniversary. We played a listener flashback and then Lorne Greene came on to warn spring breakers about the dangers of sharing needles. Bud Dickman read off his weekly list of NASCAR's most radical accidents. Then Danny Akoli came on with the Hawaiian Stock Exchange Report. David calls and has Phil throw Danny off the air because he finds out Akoli is Hawaiian for a-s-s. Chris Norton calls at the end of the hour to say he can dance so sexually Terry Schiavo would sit up in bed.Hour Two:Vernon Dozier's wife has been in a coma for the last 2 years. He wants to honor her families wishes by keeping the feeding tube in her but the bills are piling up and he has recently started dating a 30 something flight attendant/tennis player who is "high maintenance." He says that unfortunately he may be forced to remove his wife's feeding tube if he doesn't get a piece of his father-in-laws lucrative building supply business.Hour Three:Herb Sewells Michael Jackson Report starts the hour. Tonight Herb regales us with the story of child-molester Blanchard Hoyle who, while incarcerated with Herb at Atascadero, actually looked forward to his electro-shock treatments by skipping into the room and flopping on the gurney like it was a chaise lounge. Phil then plugs the website and mentions a picture of himself on the site that dates to the days when Phil would do the Rose Parade with Margaret and Harvey. Jeff Dowder comes on with another installment of "What Would Jesus Do?" Today's episode: What would Jesus do if the paper boy kept throwing Jesus' paper on a wet lawn instead of the driveway? Then Phil mentions how Pat O'Brien can go to alcohol rehab and still do his "Insider" show. Just tape his segments from the day room of the dry-out clinic just before they strap Pat down for his afternoon thorazine treatment.
Ted Williams's cryogenically frozen head comes on the show to talk about being offered the anchor job at CBS. Ted's Head got angry when Phil asked him how he was holding the phone if he's just a head. Plus, Ted Bell from Ted's of Beverly Hills hits the air excited about his new promotion: "Ladies Night." And Justin McElroy says he and his friends want the freedom to say the "F" word and the "MF" word and others without adults telling them they can't.
Hour One:Mavis Leonard, an elderly African American listener, calls Phil to say that Martha Stewart should still be in prison because if it were Oprah Winfrey, she's be "in the hole for thirty days and then cast down with the Sodomites." We then had a listener flashback request for the famous "Kiss The Gunner's Daughter" line with R.C Collins and Harvey Weirman.Hour Two:The hour kicked off with American Idol auditions featuring Lloyd Bonifide singing "Eye of the Tiger," Margaret Grey singing "Hello," R.C. singing "Tell Her About it" and Ted Bell singing "Manic Monday." The judges are Phil, Bud and David G. Hall. During the competition, as usual, Margaret and Lloyd almost get into a fist fight. Phil then talks about the horrifying story of a guy getting his face chewed off by a chimp and then welcomes on Steve Riesling of the San Diego Zoo who can't remember what a baboon or orangutan are called and spaces on what you call a giraffe.Hour ThreeArt Bell Coast to Coast starts the hour. General Johnson Jameson has been manipulating the brain of a monkey to see if it can communicate with humans. After General Jameson's final series of tests the monkey emerges from the gurney with a crisp, Oxford, England accent and twice the brains of Jameson and proceeds to kick the Generals' be-hind at scrabble. Phil then gives Bud more crap about his Babe of the Week, Paula Zahn and then he talks about the Italian journalist wounded in Iraq. Brass calls to say enough with the scores, he wants to hear more about Kobe's private life and then Phil closes out with a talk about how the NBA is probably the most criminal enterprise in America today.
Hour One:Phil started out with the "Art Donovan Commentaries, brought to you by Parker-Boles." This guy Donovan starts screaming about "the negro entertainer Chris Rock" dumping on the Academy Awards. Then Phil pulls the Backstage Pass of some pain-in-the-rear portion listener. Phil mentions 'Boy drives a Lexus and then starts talking about why he (Phil) bought a Jag and not a hybrid. Greg Grooms Gardening Tips comes on but Greg is arrested during the program and the police search his garden. They find the six month old remains of his wife, Sarah and Greg is taken away by police leaving Phil to finish his segment. Ted Bell comes on briefly to tell Phil his comments about the town of Aspen will not be recieved well by the Hollywood community. The Hal and Viola stall out their Piper Cub before they can get Phil's advice on some unacceptable thing their spoiled grandson did.Hour Two:David G. Hall comes on to get the listeners input on something he is concerned about: the fact that Phil put up the picture of a little person, listener Jenifer, on his Wall of Female Listeners. He likens it to Melissa Etheridge going out on stage bald to "make fun of our fears of radiological bombs." Then David sings "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" because that song reflects a time when dwarves could "stand tall." Then we have a listener request of a Justin McElroy flashback and that's who we have coming up in the last hour.Hour Three:Here's Justin! On to talk about what could be an epidemic of older women coming on to younger men because of the Mary Kay Letourneau case. He wants them sedated. He has also started Zookeepers Anonymous, a group of young men trying to break their habit of sleeping with older women and The Beast Patrol, a 24 hour hotline to call and get help being protected from older women. Father James McQuarters comes on to update us on Michael Jackson. Its basically this: Michael Jackson is puking his guts up and Corey Feldman is a rat bastard. Phil then reads e-mail and David calls back to say if McQuarters gets to have Irish harp music played while he is on, David wants Doris Day music played while he's on.
Hour One: Ted Bell is asking women coming to his restaurant on Valentines Day to dress Las Vegas formal (meaning show some cleavage and leg) That way he and his bus boys who can't be with their women on Valentines Day can have something to look at. Then we played a Vernon Dozier flashback in which he explains that once one of his students graduates, he's going to ask her to marry him.Hour Two: Dr Jim Sadler believes he was sexually harassed by a neighbor, not the other way around, when he placed her hand down his workout tights to check out a "muscle group." He also mentioned that he is in training for the "Mr Armstrong Competition" whatever that is. Phil then talks about moving to Extra Sports AM570 and how the press, predictably, paint it in the most negative light possible. Phil talks about the fact that everyday he is on the air, it's a reminder to other radio talent just how average they are.Hour Three Phil reads some e-mails from idiot listeners who already have problems with the new website design and other troubles they are having and then talks about how completely unlike real listeners these people are. Lanson O'Dell, NFL running back comes in the studio and talks about being at the Super Bowl. Phil then takes some calls from chicks who are trying to sound like they just want to say "hi" but in fact are trying to win a Pajama Gram from Vermont Teddy Bear. Phil hangs up on them. Harvey Weirman's Law Talk features analysis of the Bill Cosby scandal. Harvey's eyes are so bad he butchers Bill Cosby's name into "Buck Cornwall."
Friday, January 28, 2005 Hour 1: Tonight is an all request show, featuring bits from Austin Amarka, Bobbie Dooley, Raj Fahneen, Ted Bell, with special appearances by Hal and Viola, RC Collins, and Bud Dickman! Hour 2: The all request show continues, with classic bits from Vernon Dozier, Art Bell and General Johnson Jamison, Lloyd Bonifide, Margaret Gray, and Ted Bell. Bud calls and insists on playing the bit where he farts, and a special request from Charlie the Complainer: to speak to Lowry Mays! Hour 3: Hour three of the all request show kicks off with Vernon Dozier and “Plane go Boom.” This hour also features bits from Herb Sewell, Doug Dannger, Margaret Gray, Bobbie Dooley, Paul McNamara, and capping off the show with Margaret Gray, David G. Hall and Lloyd Bonifide in the classic “Say you say me.” Show log by Kyle Davis.
Monday, January 24, 2005 Hour 1: Ted Bell from Ted’s of Beverly Hills Steakhouse joins the program to promote his dining etiquette classes. Phil tries to give one of these classes away on air, but Ted stops him due to his nervousness over letting Phil’s listeners into his restaurant. He thinks the talk radio listener is a lower class citizen, and before they can take his etiquette class, they need a remedial class on hygiene, including washing their hands after they use the toilet. Towards the end of the segment, a German woman calls in disgust; this causes Ted Bell to yodel! Show flashback of Lloyd Bonifide describing his hatred of French Poodles, and he tries to kill himself with an electric can opener. Hour 2: Margaret Gray is the guest for the hour. She explains that it is risky to rent property to single mothers. Margaret believes it is legitimate, as a landlord, to ask the question if all the children come from the same father, and worry if the woman has a lot of male callers coming to the home. Hour 3: Doug Dannger, writer for the Orange County Courier, is the guest in the third hour. Doug is a gay man and gay journalist, and he is writing an article about the Great American Smoke-out. As part of his investigation, he is going to out in public places and smoking to see how people react. He says because he is gay, nobody will have the temerity to go eyeball to eyeball with him and tell him to put out his cigarette. Show log by Kyle Davis.
Friday, January 7, 2005 Hour 1: The Skippy and Frank Show kicks off the program. Skippy and Frank call into Thai food restaurants to tell the workers that all their relatives died in the tsunami. It’s real cutting edge comedy! Then they get fired… again. Phil talks tsunami damage further and considers if a tidal wave of that magnitude would create the same destruction should it happed to LA. Bud has breaking news that Brad Pitt and Jennifer Anniston split. Bud attempts to interview Jennifer Anniston from the bathroom at the LA Laker game. And a caller informs Phil that he’s got the rights to ‘Phil Hendrie Show’ and that Phil is breaking copyright law! Hour 2: Ted Bell from Ted’s of Beverly Hills Steakhouse joins the program to promote his dining etiquette classes. Phil tries to give one of these classes away on air, but Ted stops him due to his nervousness over letting Phil’s listeners into his restaurant. He thinks the talk radio listener is a lower class citizen, and before they can take his etiquette class, they need a remedial class on hygiene, including washing their hands after they use the toilet. Towards the end of the segment, a German woman calls in disgust; this causes Ted Bell to yodel! Show flashback of Lloyd Bonifide describing his hatred of French Poodles, and he tries to kill himself with an electric can opener. Hour 3: Harvey Wireman hosts Senior Chat. Tonight’s discussion revolves around which odious political opinions can you get away with among your family and loved ones because you are old and feeble. Later, Little Judy Horick is on the program. She is 5-year-old girl but she sounds like a 52 year old man. Phil reads the news. David G. Hall convinces Phil to let Tsunami Sam back on the air. Bob Bakian reports some bad news.
Monday, December 6, 2004 Hour 1: Herb Sewell says Christmas is not good for kids. Chris Norton says don't arrest hot seductive teachers. Steve Bosell says waving sparklers makes you look like Tinkerbell. Hour 2: Rudy Canoza becomes a lecherous Latin Santa to help make the moms feel more sexual. Hour 3: Phil complains about his laryngitis. Christian. Margaret Grey sings. Ted Bell t-shirts. Phil on looking good while married, pictures, eating out with his kids, Barry Bonds, illegal drugs and fireworks.
Thursday, December 2, 2004 Hour 1: Chris Norton has a problem with the arrest of seductive teacher Debra LaFave because she is hot. Hour 2: Ted Bell believes that his sizable earnings excuse him from any problems with hiring illegal immigrants. Hour 3: Justin McElroy wants the Sadie Hawkins high school dance postponed due to the massive amount of pressure his mom's friends put on him.
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