Author: admin-philhendrieshow-dev

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Tonights Show Material

STORIES AND AUDIO
CHARACTER // OPEN // CHARACTER
TV ratings: NBA Finals Game 7 dominates Thursday
Hayward Steps Back From Spill Response as BP Reports Gains
*Crowds jam Universal Orlando Harry Potter opening
*Official: Justice Department plans to sue over Arizona law
Study: Teens not the worst text-driving culprits
Ohio Police Can Guess Whether Drivers Are Speeding
*Utah firing squad executes convicted killer
Family Time: Mom and Dad Charged after Driving Teen to Fight
*’Please Don’t Feed Our Bums’ Stickers Called Hateful and Intolerant
ParentDish’s Top 25 Summer-Themed Movies for Kids to Teens
Bill Would Let Feds Take Over Internet During Crisis
Angelina Jolie Criticized for Playing Cleopatra
Woman who Suffers from a Fear of Monkeys is Savagely Attacked by Monkeys at Retreat Meant to Conquer her Fear of Monkeys
*Dozens Arrested in Violence Following Lakers Championship Win
*Perez Hilton explains his part in Miley Cyrus photo scandal on ‘The Joy Behar Show’
Father’s Day gift spending is up, but still don’t spend as much on dad as they do on mom
Tea Party Calls Chris Matthews Documentary A ‘Left-Wing Hit Piece,’ Urges Hardball Sponsors To Boycott
Weekend Briefing: ‘Toy Story 3’s Abuzz, ‘Jonah’s Vexed
It’s the happiest day of the year! Third Friday in June is perfect storm of good feelings: scientist
‘Intimate waxing’ nearly costs man a testicle
Archived audio:
AUDIO:

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Jay Santos and the Citizens Auxiliary Police LAKER Parade Information

2010 Championship Parade Information
June 17, 2010

LOS ANGELES LAKERS HOST DOWNTOWN PARADE TO CELEBRATE 16TH NBA CHAMPIONSHIP

From the desk of Brigadier Admiral Jay Santos

‘OS ANGE’ES – The ‘os Ange’es ‘akers wi” host a ce’ebratory parade for a” ‘ocal fans on Monday, June 21, starting at STAP’ES Center and trave’ing south on Figueroa Street to Jefferson Bou’evard, just north of the USC campus and Ga’en Center.

By defeating the Boston Ce’tics for the 2010 NBA championship, the ‘akers not on’y earned the franchise’s 16th ‘eague tit’e but a’so repeated as champions for the third time in the past decade. The ‘akers have won back-to-back tit’es a tota’ of seven times in franchise history, tying the NBA mark previous’y he’d by the Ce’tics. Tonight’s victory marks on’y the fourth of the ‘akers’ 16 NBA tit’es that went to a deciding seventh game, and the first time besting the Ce’tics in a seventh game.

Based on attendance for the 2002 NBA championship parade and ‘ast season’s festivities, the Citizens Auxi’iary Police anticipate a crowd of between maybe 2,000  and probab’y a mi”ion fans ‘ining the two-mi’e parade route a’ong South Figueroa Street.

Whi’e the City of ‘os Ange’es and hometown ‘akers he’d an accompanying ra”y attended by more than 95,000 inside the Co’iseum to mark the 2009 championship, this time around, p’ayers wi” interact with fans from a customized f’at-bed f’oat, equipped with audio capabi’ities. That wi” he’p to mitigate anticipated pedestrian and traffic congestion, whi’e a’so re’ieving security, sanitation and other civic demands otherwise required of the privately funded 2010 ceremonies.

Beginning at approximate’y e’even a.m. (PDT), ‘akers p’ayers and their famil’es wi” board the customized f’oat at STAP’ES Center, and begin winding their way down South Figueroa Street toward the USC campus before turning east on Jefferson Bou’evard at the Ga’en Center to comp’ete the parade. A convoy of doub’e-decker, open-air buses and other attending vehic’es wi” carry ‘akers coaches and staff, members of the Buss fami’y ownership group, team officia’s, and the ‘aker Gir’s to the conc’usion of the two-mile route.

CAP recommends that, whenever possib’e, fans take the Metro Rai’ system to the Pico/Chick Hearn station adjacent to the parade route rather than attempt to drive into the STAP’ES Center and Figueroa area. Parking will be availab’e in the downtown lots surrounding STAP’ES Center and the Figueroa corridor, yet street c’osures beginning the night before are l’ke’y to make morning traffic far more difficu’t.

We at CAP anticipate ‘APD c’osing Figueroa Street between O’ympic Bou’evard to the north and Jefferson Bou’evard on the south beginning at midnight Sunday. Other road c’osures include Chick Hearn Court between Figueroa Street and Cherry Street; Cherry Street between O’ympic and Pico Bou’evards; F’ower Street between Washington and Jefferson Bou’evards; Jefferson Bou’evard between Figueroa and Hoover Streets; and a” intersections a’ong the two-mi’e route as designated by the ‘os Ange’es Po’ice Department (a’so known as the ‘APD) and Department of Transportation. ‘APD and DOT anticipate reopening major intersections a’ong Figueroa Street as the parade commences, pending pedestrians in those areas having dispersed and other safety conditions being met which I can assure you they wi”. So ‘ong everybody. Go ‘akers!

‘AKERS P’ANNED PARADE ROUTE

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Show Log for Thursday, June 17, 2010

Aspiring LAPD officer Dave Oliva joined us in our first hour as some street activity was turning ugly outside the Staples Center, where the LA Lakers has just won the NBA title. Phil wondered openly where the police were with cars getting jumped on and fires getting set. Dave said that cops have to “weigh their options before they go in.” Do they want to “go home because their shift is over or go ahead and help out.” He also told Phil to be careful about flooring it to get out of there if he were stuck because he may find a crushed sombrero and poncho under the car and that means he ran over an illegal. “People’ll think you’re a Minuteman!”

Assholes outside Staple center last night. That guy up front oughta be easy enough to identify

Steve Bosell also joined us this evening to tell us his daughter’s middle school class has done it again. He has seen the light.  He though a little boy wearing toy soldiers on his hat was okay but his daughter and her middle school class, teachers and administration taught him what a warmonger he is. As Steve was being screamed at by one caller, his daughter passed him a question to ask the woman. “My daughter wants to know if, when you sit on your husband’s chest…” Phil cut him off…but not before Steve cried for the scumbag that died in front of a firing squad last night in Utah.

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Tonights Show Material

06-17-10 stories and audio
CHARACTER // CHARACTER // OPEN
TV Ratings: NBC’s ‘Talent,’ FOX’s ‘Dance’ split Wednesday
*GOP leaders forced Rep. Barton to retract apology to BP
BP Oil Spill: Against Gov. Jindal’s Wishes, Crude-Sucking Barges Stopped by Coast Guard for More than 24 Hours
*BP exec pilloried by lawmakers
Justices Allow Search of Work-Issued Pager
7 Crazy Celebrity Mansions
Jeremy London Kidnapped, ‘Forced’ To Smoke Drugs
*Up-skirt Miley Cyrus Photo Child Porn?
Angelina Jolie Criticized for Playing Cleopatra
Poll: Americans more concerned with economy, jobs than oil spill
*Hillary Clinton Says White House Will Sue Over Arizona Immigration Law
Toy soldiers run afoul of school’s weapons ban
UK watchdog says teach sex to kids from age five
*Southwest Finds Shipment of Heads on a Plane
Sexy dancer from Craigslist too old, man tells police
*World Cup chiefs won’t ban vuvuzelas
Male menopause does exist, but it’s rare, says study
South African man beaten to death by wife, children for watching World Cup
Betty White: No New Nude Photos
Yankees ban vuvuzela pests’ instrument of torture
FORTHCOMING LAKERS-CELTICS STORY
ARCHIVED AUDIO:

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“Margaret Grey’s A Little Bird Told Me”-Rep. Joe Barton Apologizes For ‘Misconstruction’ Of His Apology To BP

It took a few hours, but Congressman Joe Barton, a blithering ass if ever God squeezed one out, has finally come out and retracted his apology to BP for having had to put up $20 billion in an escrow account for claims. After stating that his comments, in which he said he was “ashamed” of the White House for “shaking down” BP were ‘misconstrued,’ he announced that “I want to apologize for that misconstruction.” In other words, homeboy couldn’t weasel his way out of this one so he might as well tell the truth. Jayzuz.

Given the passion with which he initially commiserated with BP CEO Tony Hayward this morning on being forced to establish a “slush fund,” and the clarity of the language he used, it’s hard to imagine where exactly the “misconstruction” lay, though it appears from further statements that he believed the misconstruction involved the belief that he did not think BP should be held responsible. Oh horse dung. He retracted the entire apology because he didn’t make any sense even to Republicans and it became clear there wasn’t aything to clarify. Just some rambling jazz that had to be incinerated. Here’s the incineration:

“I apologize for using the term ’shakedown’ with regard to yesterday’s actions at the White House in my opening statement this morning, and I retract my apology to BP. As I told my colleagues yesterday and said again this morning, BP should bear the full financial responsibility for the accident on their lease in the Gulf of Mexico. BP should fully compensate those families and businesses that have been hurt by this accident. BP and the federal government need to stop the leak, clean up the damage, and take whatever steps necessary to prevent a similar accident in the future.”

Now go away.