Hour 1: Steve & Bobbie say all Catholic priests are molesters, all Italians are Mafia and all Jews are tight with money [DJB]. Hour 2: Doug Dannger presents his What’s Hot & What’s Not list, but his picks are all obsolete by 5 or 10 years. he says not to argue with him because he's got HomoVision. Hour 3: VARIETY.

Hour 1: Clara Bingham says Martin Luther King’s dream of equality is about to be realized with the acquittal of Robert Blake [DJB]. Hour 2: VARIETY. Hour 3: Steve Bosell is suing the estate of Robert Blake because he wanked to a nude picture not knowing it was an autopsy photo. Steve is worried he's a necrophiliac.

Hour 1: VARIETY. Hour 2: Vernon Dozier (9 minutes in) says that the American friendly fire incident on Canadian troops was a cover-up for shooting at Americans. Vernon says he was in the CIA. Hour 3: Margaret Gray believes that because of post-OJ backlash, Robert Blake will be found guilty, even if he isn’t [DJB].

Hour 1: Ted Bell wants to cancel the NBA playoffs because of the terror threat. He just wants the championship be awarded to the Lakers. Hour 2: James Wickham on the Catholic church scandal. He says Protestants are also molesting kids but aren’t being persecuted like the Catholics are [DJB]. Hour 3: Roland Schwinn of “Fat Pride” is suing CBS over the fact that fat people are not being represented on Survivor.

Hour 1: RC Collins says if he's gonna fight in Afghanistan he wants Tiger Woods representing Americans, not Jack Nicklaus. The academy has a foghorn that sounds when a cadet is washed out; he uses it on callers. Hour 2: VARIETY. Hour 3: Bobbie Dooley says the Springtacular will have to be rescheduled because Janice Greely’s husband was caught in the bathroom masturbating. Her husband's underwear was stuck together. The bit ends with Bobbie catching Steve in the bathroom with Kool & The Gang "Celebration" playing. Closes with a flashback of 2002-04-15b and a reprise of Bobby Dooley catching Steve.

Hour 1: VARIETY. Margaret complains Phil has been playing her rendition of Snowbird quite a bit lately. Hour 2: Father McQuarters is a priest with "Humor To Heal". He makes the rounds at various parishes to tell inappropriate Catholic jokes to lighten the mood over the molestation scandal. Toward the end Phil starts using a laugh track. Phil closes with a flashback of 2002-04-12b MGR and a bit of Margaret Gray's "1, 2, 3, and a 1-2-3" from the Snowbird bit 2002-04-11c. Hour 3: Kyle is an insecure man who compulsively requires his wife to keep the phone with her and on at all times, even in churches and movie theaters, because the post 9/11 world is dangerous.

Hour 1: Margaret Gray explainings her new female empowerment course that promotes an aggressive public approach. Hour 2: Ted Bell is serving up cat meat in his restaurant's entrees, having been inspired after a trip to the Philippines. He says he prepares dead family pets for patrons kids, telling them that their pet is now nourishing them. They can even play with their food, like they did the pet. Flashback of 2002-04-11c MGR Snowbird. Hour 3: VARIETY.

Hour 1: David G Hall says he's gay and is in love with Eric Karros of the L.A. Dodgers, but is just cranking Phil. Hour 2: Ted Bell in studio promoting a new bowling shirt but he can't 'hit the post' with his jingle. Bobbie Dooley calls in and Harvey Wireman visits the studio. Hour 3: Bob Green has started the Spades Social Club where men can tell racist jokes without their wives breaking their balls. Phil closes with Margaret Gray singing a brassy blues number about doing domestic chores ("I'm A Woman") and Anne Murray's "Snowbird" with Freudian slips.

Hour 1: VARIETY. Hour 2: Raj Fahneen's son got a scholarship to UCLA. He says American kids are cowards because they are unwilling to make the ultimate sacrifice for their country as suicide bombers, like the Palestinian extremists. Hour 3: Dean Wheeler of Fathers With Pride heads an organization for male ex-husbands that professes to show how men are the better half, but his spiel backfires.

Hour 1: Bobbie Dooley is sickened by the choice of cars some of their neighbors are buying for their kids. Hour 2: Vernon Dozier speaks out against parents who hug their children more than once a year. He says once a year will keep them going for a long time. Vernon is with Operation Assisting Kids Safely (OAKS), who address the problem of sexual predators. Hour 3: VARIETY.