Hour 1:

Ted Bell of Ted’s of Beverly Hills joins the show to discuss an assault by his wife after she tried to stick a finger up his “you know where.” (Almost like a Steve Bosell bit.) Phil closes by revealing he did the voice of Ted.

Hour 2:

FIRST HALF. Bobbie Dooley says she got uterine cancer from a nasty bike at a workout center. Her story grows unbelievable. SECOND HALF. Phil takes calls, emphasizes they don’t have any actors. Phil talks about porn actors doing news reports. Caller talks about Osama bin Laden.

Hour 3:

FIRST TWO THIRDS. Chris Norton with After Dark Escort Service, which allows unmarried women in their late 20’s to get escorted. LAST THIRD. Phil talks to callers, the American idea of mens’ fantasies, takes more calls, Phil hangs up on someone, says ‘no talking about the show’.

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