Monday, September 30, 2002 Hour 1: Vernon Dozier says that when his wife stopped dying her hair blonde, their sex life went downhill. She just wanted to be herself. Vernon says when a woman says that you might as well throw your penis out the window while you're driving down the street. At 25m Vernon tries to confuse a caller and make Phil take the heat on a comment, then he starts assuming all the callers are black. Hour 2: David G Hall, station manager, hates people who use up their employer's health benefits, and says non-management should have to pay out of pocket since they're not part of the driving force of the business. Hour 3: VARIETY.

Friday, September 27, 2002 Hour 1: LIVE SHOW. Steve Bosell thinks there's something wrong with the Irish gene that incites people to violence. cites the Fighting Irish and his tantrum where he stabbed a Lucky Charms box. Hour 2: LIVE SHOW. Ted Bell is honoring charity gift certificates for 9-11 but wants his name and his restaurant on the World Trade Center memorial, along with the children's menu and the phone number. Towards the end, during his jingle, he says, "You can all go straight to hell!" Hour 3: LIVE SHOW. Bobbie Dooley is snowboarding with her sons because it makes them young and cool -- she also knocked down a deaf skiier because she didn't get out of the way.

Thursday, September 26, 2002 Hour 1: VARIETY. Hour 2: Doug Dannger says Phil Hendrie is a traitor to the Democratic party because he supports the war on Iraq and he should be listening to Barbra Streisand's anti-war stance. Hour 3: RC Collins is a military cadet who says that soldiers should be allowed a polygamist lifestyle so that they can taste all the fruits of life before sacrificing theirselves for their country.

Wednesday, September 25, 2002 Hour 1: Bob McGraw is publishing a book to benefit Alzheimers charities which makes fun of some of the things Alzheimers sufferers do. Hour 2: Larry Grover thought that a coworker's ultrasound picture was obscene and graphic, so he put up a graphic picture of his own to offend her. He thinks the uterus is the vagina. Phil tries to figure out if anyone seriously believes his characters are for real. Hour 3: VARIETY.

Tuesday, September 24, 2002 Hour 1: Clara Bingham, a teacher, says it's better to insult a child than to spank him. Hour 2: VARIETY. Hour 3: VARIETY.

Monday, September 23, 2002 Hour 1: VARIETY. Hour 2: Bob Green refused to allow his supermarket staff to break up a fight between a mother and her child. Phil talks about disciplining his kids. Hour 3: Chris Norton is insisting on rights to visit the kids he fathered at the sperm bank, and if he doesn't get them, he's telling the mothers he's part Mexican, which will make them sue the sperm bank.

Friday, September 20, 2002 Hour 1: RERUN of 2002-09-05 hour two. Clara's breast augmentation surgery. Hour 2: Bobbie Dooley says negative punishment is a bad idea for teenagers, and that parents should reaffirm. Hour 3: VARIETY.

Thursday, September 19, 2002 Hour 1: Deb Turner says the 9-11 terrorists just needed the love of their fathers. Hour 2: VARIETY. Hour 3: Lloyd Bonafide is an elderly man who is frustrated that his wife has to pee a lot on long car trips, and says that 9-11 made her a wimp.

Wednesday, September 18, 2002 Hour 1: VARIETY. Hour 2: Steve Bosell is seeking a restraining order against an Italian neighbor because his Italian mannerisms will scare a lot of people when the new season of Sopranos starts. Hour 3: Dean Wheeler thinks that people who were emotionally scarred by 9-11 were once abused as children. Phil closes talking about a CEO who hosted a lavish birthday party for his wife in Sardinia and is now going to jail.

Tuesday, September 17, 2002 Hour 1: Vernon Dozier is cheating on his wife, and he says it's because he's trying to get this girl to stop stripping. His wife is upset. We also find that Vernon sleeps with his wife’s mother and sister. Hour 2: Margaret Gray wants Christopher Reeve to be the first to walk again so that he can scare all the Arabs. Hour 3: VARIETY.