Kindermorden!

Jay Santos of the Citizens Auxiliary Police has some strong suspicions about a mother who "accidentally" dropped her infant from a suspension bridge. from September 1999.(0:35:28)

Lifetrack Computer

Jay Santos discusses Lifetrack, new software that keeps track of every piece of information that goes into your computer and downloads it onto a government computer. from KFI.(0:36:43)

Mountain Trash

Jay santos of Citizens Auxiliary police explains why we need to be suspicious of people who live in the mountains. Featuring a special appearance by Major Elvis Newton! From May [...]

Operation: Child

Jay Santos states that Al Quida was successful in attacking the US due to Americans being flabby, that's why he's taking money away from kids in fast food restaurants! from January [...]

Operation: Clearinghouse

Jay Santos has launched an operation to try and stop women's bachelorette parties because they have greatly affected the amount of nuns there are in the world. from May 2003.(0:24:46)

Rubberneckers & Lookie-Lou’s

Jay Santos and The CAP are working with the "New Mexico People Range Patrol" to keep motorists from California away from the Los Alamos, NM fire -- and they will be checking cars [...]

Shark Attack!

Jay Santos calls in to tell Phil how he survived 2 shark attacks and how he kicked both of their asses. From January 1999.(0:35:12)

Shootin’ Off Bottle Rockets

As fires blaze in Corona, auxiliary officer Jay Santos makes no secret of that fact that he was recently disposing of fireworks he confiscated on the 4th of July... by setting them [...]

Sinister Treehouse

(A very early version of) Jay Santos discusses a property dispute he had with his neighbor concerning a treehouse that overlooked his property. from KFI.(0:39:49)

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