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On tonights show, Dr. Ron Tarner, an astronomer and astrophysicist, tells us that he has been asked by an old friend, Dr. Bob Winslow of the Mountain Meadow School District, to teach a class in sexual abstinence to middle schoolers. Because of budget cuts the school is short of teachers. So Ron agrees and tells the children that the best way to abstain from sex is by masturbating. In speaking with the parents, Ron says he has to “go slow and explain very carefully that you can’t make babies from masturbation.” Ron feels that as a very educated man he might as well be talking to people in “bonnets from the 17th century who believe that flickering lights caused by swamp gas are actually dancing elves and pixies.”

Ted Bell joins Phil for a discussion of LeBron James and another “backstabber, Don Voges.” Mr. Voges is a former chef who worked for Ted until Don took a job at a Shula Steak House in Memphis so he could be close to the St. Judes Hospital for Children. Don’s daughter is sick with Leukemia. Ted however says the guy was “stepping over my body like I’m a passed out drunk in a doorway” on his way to better money the same way Lebron James “stepped over Dan Gilberts body in a doorway.” Ted finally says that what James did is like “digging up James Naismiths corpse and playing with his remains by the moonlight.”

Showing 5 comments
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    plunderpants

    Well, Phil’s still revealing the lists in the least dramatic way. I understand it would be a nightmare for you, Jason, to tell him again, but it would make very entertaining video to watch him go off on me, vicariously through you!

  • Avatar
    gianmarc-reg994

    The opening discussion of cause and effect in this videocast was profoundly insightful and inspiring. Thanks for the candor, Phil. Gave me quite a bit to think about as it relates to my personal life and ambitions.

  • Avatar
    female-reg411

    "I’m getting ink ….. oh I’m getting ink. Alright I’ve got the ink. This better be the fuckin ink!"

  • Avatar
    john-reg436

    The 6pm or 3pm videocasts should be available in archived format, too.

  • Avatar
    jagr-reg720

    What pisses me off most about the whole Mel Gibson thing – as it is with so many instances like this – it’s never the fact that someone flat out abuses women, or says "i hope you get raped" – no it comes down to race. I hate the fact that women are lower on that totem pole than anyone, specifically male, else. Never matters what skin she has on. Race wars, fake tits- whatever- if you’re female, you might as well expect abuse towards you to be glossed over. The fact his [Mel’s] abuse was anti-fem, but got turned into a race war was too typical of what matters. Nevermind he considers women an accesory – he said the N word. That was more important, not "equally" important than the fact that he used that word to ignorantly project. What a great free-world we live in.

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