Lloyd Bonafide is insistent that when the youth center he and his wife financially support has its teen formal dance for underprivileged youth, a song he wrote called “I Gotta Rock” be played by the band. The songs lyrics go “I gotta rock, I gotta rock, for God’s sake do I have to rock.”
Paul “Tubby” Lane believes the time honored racing tactic of “drafting” can be used on freeways to save gasoline. Smaller cars can draft behind larger “gas pigs.” If the car in front slows down, you pull the wheel left or right and slingshot past traffic so fast, you can “put your feet up on the dash and catch some REM sleep.”
David G. Hall is on Hollywood Blvd. for Ryan Seacrest’s Hollywood Star. He wants Phil to start talking about the new Pope but do it in a way that doesn’t repeat everything people have been saying already, like him having been in the Hitler Youth. Phil fails so David suggest Phil do it with a Chinese accent. Then Phil reads a note from Brian Grant’s publicist asking that Phil back off the Brian Grant impressions. Phil raps about how the a Pope getting elected doesn’t do diddly to the stock market. The Phil reads some “Funniest Show Lines” but realizes he is repeating a lot of lines from before, So he takes a call from Nick Holovak, a crossing guard who repeats stuff he heard on the cross walk this morning.