Tonight we brought on the show Professor Emory Clayton of LA Canyon College to explain the Four Lokko controversy. This alcohol/caffeine drink has swept American campuses with some tragic results. Students have been hospitalized with alcohol poisoning due to the highly caffeinated drink delaying the effect of alcohol intoxication. One young man shot himself after a night of drinking Four Lokko. Professor Clayton tells Phil and his listeners that its clear the government needs to step in "and step on these entrepreneurial exercises that target our young people without regard to health or safety." He went on to descibe his experimentation with Four Lokko. "I drank a couple before a teacher/student conference with a young lady not feeling I'd be in danger since my students drink them and know the effects. Well I became intoxicated to the point of feeling God-like, as if I had power over all living things on earth." When told he shouldn't have been drinking before the conference, Professor Clayton said "I usually drink a Johnny Walker Blue with a water back before all my conferences so this shouldn't have been any big deal."
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