It was Ted Bell tonight, president of the Beverly Hills Automoble Association, protesting the high number of tickets police seem to give to drivers in Mercedes and other “HPV” cars (High-performance vehicles) Ted feels that if a man drives an HPV (His is a 55 T-Bird, two-tone) he is more likely to drive safely. Why would he want to wreck a beautiful car while people that drive “Smart Cars and PT Cruisers probably can’t wait to wreck them.”
Later it was Harvey Weirman, retired attorney. Phil discussed with Harvey the case of a firefighter putting the video of a fatality crash on YouTube and how the victims parents saw it. Harvey mentioned a case he’s involved in. An old man drove his car into a “vegetable mart” while the man’s grandson video-recorded the whole event, then later gave it a soundtrack and put it on YouTube. “That’s different though” said Harvey. “The kid did that to reach out to anyone his grandfather hit so they could get their contact info. Not to pay for damages. Just to acknowledge they did in fact contact his grandfathers car in an unfortunate manner and he and his grandfather are sorry they did that.”
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I laughed pretty hard when Harvey came out with the "situation with vegetables" line…lo
Pre-show Harvey cracked me up ….. "You all tucked in? Yea? …. FUCK you."
Best bedtime story ever.
I bet Steven Slater will end up in the next John Waters film.
I so agree with you on Hummers. WHY, indeed! ESP in suburbs. GAH.
Teds segment was a good listen. The material wasn't all that stellar on this segment, but Ted really seemed to rile up the crowd. Ted's little drops for the commercials were hillarious tonight, full of innuendo's and clever comments (the customers will cum out of their pants for our appetizers'… ooops, probably shouldn't have said that)…. I found his little comments and commercial drops funnier than they've been since 2007… which gave the segment some much needed personality.. Great improvement Phil!
Harvey's bit had a tonne of potential, I think it suffered from a lack of good callers. Phil missed out on some good oppourtunities to make up some phunny scenarios by asking Harvey "Who is your client" "Where were they going" etc.. etc.. Harvey just had the "None of your business" response, which is decidedly unphunny… Plan to succeed Phil… Comedy 101, the answer is almost never "no" its, "yes and"..