Friday, February 28, 2003 Hour 1: Ted Bell and Robert Green are holding a fundraiser for a military orphan fund at their restaurant, but are completely evasive on what percentage is going to the charity. Hour 2: RERUN of 2003-02-13 hour one. Racism alive in Hollywood. Hour 3: RERUN of 2003-01-13 hour two. Hollywood is safe from terrorism.

Thursday, February 27, 2003 Hour 1: Bobbie Dooley is an HOA president who is going into people's houses and making sure they aren't hoarding food, given the runup to the Iraq War. Hour 2: RERUN of 2003-02-12 hour three. Will You Be My Mommy show. Hour 3: RERUN of 2003-01-31 hour one. Abandoning unruly kids to teach them a lesson.

Wednesday, February 26, 2003 Hour 1: RERUN of 2003-02-11 hour two. Replacing the Vietnam War memorial. Hour 2: RERUN of 2003-02-12 hour one. Slobs at the gas station. Hour 3: RERUN of 2003-01-30 hour onerecognizing a faithful murderer.

Tuesday, February 25, 2003 Hour 1: Clara Bingham's private school allows parents to pay for their kids to dress provocatively in order to fund the school's missionary work. Hour 2: VARIETY. Hour 3: (FIRST HALF) Father James McQuarters says that young women who don't want to get married use molestation as an excuse to get out of it. (SECOND HALF) Flashback of 2003-02-24b. Phil talks about a French chef that killed himself over a rating and laughs that Academy Award nominees might do the same.

Monday, February 24, 2003 Hour 1: VARIETY. Hour 2: Jim Sadler says that doctors are under so much pressure and have to deal with rude people so much that they're likely to take it out on patients in small ways. Hour 3: Steve Bosell made an anatomically correct snowman for a group of young kids, and is pre-emptively suing their offended parents. At the end, Phil beats the war drums for an Iraq invasion.

Friday, February 21, 2003 Hour 1: RERUN of 2003-01-29 hour three. Teaching teenage boys to be womanizers. Hour 2: Ted Bell is a wealthy restaurant owner who donated $27,000 in Girl Scout cookies for the troops but he expects special treatment for smallpox and nerve gas vaccinations. Hour 3: RC Collins is a cadet who thinks that soldiers should be allowed to quit if things get a little too hairy and they feel their lives are in imminent danger.

Thursday, February 20, 2003 Hour 1: David G Hall, station manager, is preventing Phil from talking about the Iraq War because listeners aren't informed enough to make decisions and because it might upset anti-war listeners. Hour 2: VARIETY. Hour 3: Bob Green held a girl at his store for knocking over a Gala apple display and prevented her from leaving until she fixed it.

Wednesday, February 19, 2003 Hour 1: VARIETY. Hour 2: Don Parsley was fired from his job because he couldn't make it in during a blizzard. he recites a litany of tragedy and asks for donations but his stories begin falling apart. He ends by saying his wife was abducted by aliens. Phil closes pimping the BSP. Hour 3: Herb Sewell is a researcher who is concerned about all the studies about wine being healthy, and thinks that women are just turning into a bunch of winos.

Tuesday, February 18, 2003 Hour 1: Vernon Dozier is a pollster and says that people are lying on surveys about how they feel iin the post-9-11 world. The famous 9/11 survey. Hour 2: Doug Dannger talks about a new show called Joe Retard about a retarded man who won a multimillion dollar settlement -- how long will a group of potential bachelorettes be able to take it. Hour 3: VARIETY.

Monday, February 17, 2003 Hour 1: Bobbie Dooley is protesting the war with other Hollywood stars, saying that America needs to keep its nose out of other countries' business. Hour 2: VARIETY. Hour 3: Larry Grover says that kids are being disrespectful when they're trying to look smart in front of adults.