Shootin’ Off Bottle Rockets

As fires blaze in Corona, auxiliary officer Jay Santos makes no secret of that fact that he was recently disposing of fireworks he confiscated on the 4th of July... by setting them [...]

Vagina Monolougues

Jay Santos is stading in front of the Vagina Monologues in LA asking women to put Burkah on so that they can "think about what they just did."(0:16:38)


If your personalized license plates are a distraction, Citizen's Auxillary Police will flag you down! from May 2001.(0:27:40)

Telemarketing Technique

Telemarketer Jay Santos wants to save you hundreds of dollars a month on your long distance bill, just listen to his 30 second pitch! Don't hang up on him or he'll just call you [...]

Angel On My Shoulder

The Citizens Auxiliary Police have started a service to monitor drinking teens.(0:34:26)

Shark Attack!

Jay Santos calls in to tell Phil how he survived 2 shark attacks and how he kicked both of their asses. From January 1999.(0:35:12)

Stop Pornography Week

Jay Santos and the C.A.P. will be videotaping people leaving video stores, and peeking in people's bags to see what sex videos they're renting. They're trying to keep the streets [...]

Mountain Trash

Jay santos of Citizens Auxiliary police explains why we need to be suspicious of people who live in the mountains. Featuring a special appearance by Major Elvis Newton! From May [...]

Invasive procedures on Patients

Jay Santos is performing routine Anthrax searches on hospital patients the easiest way he knows how… holding them down and shoving microscopes up their nasal cavities. Hear [...]

Rubberneckers & Lookie-Lou’s

Jay Santos and The CAP are working with the "New Mexico People Range Patrol" to keep motorists from California away from the Los Alamos, NM fire -- and they will be checking cars [...]

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