Hour 1:
Margaret Grey called to say she doesn't believe Melissa Etheridge has breast cancer and coming on the Grammies with a bald head to pretend she has been getting chemo is lower than low. She just wants to say she has breast cancer to be "clique" like everyone else. Phil points out no one watched the Grammies and so why is he doing this bit anyway. A listener flashback is played, this one featuring Herb Sewell who slept with his junior partners daughter and doesn't care because he can fire her father if he complains. Phil comments on Bud's Babe of the Week Oprah Winfrey and mentions that Maria and the kids are in Hawaii so he went out and got drunk Saturday night.
Hour 2:
Vernon Dozier is on to promote his book, The Wages of Sin: Surviving Road Rage. Vernon says through Jesus and therapy he is cured of road rage......except when he sees women using hands-free cell phones, flossing their teeth or putting on make-up while driving. He feels emasculated.
Hour 3:
The Jim Rome Show has Romey interviewing Jose Canseco until Jose starts shooting up steroids and morphs into an ape. He then strangles Jim and takes over the show, taking a few more calls while jabbering into the microphone. Phil then reads the news about Mary Kay Letourneau marrying the student she had sex with when he was 12. Phil theorizes that it'll be about five years before we get the news that one has murdered the other and dismembered the body. The Dreen Flew Pet Show has Darren taking calls from dogs. One, a St Bernard named Ben calls in and Darren determines that the old lady who owns him doesn't bath or groom him. Other dogs check in, a Dachshund named Carl, an Afghan named Gretchen and a Bulldog named Chuck who advises Ben to bite her and give her rabies. Harvey Weirman calls in with a legal review of the Letourneau case and he, as usual, can't pronounce anything properly. And finally the show ends with play by play of the Dodgers vs. a team of blind musicians. The Dodgers get touched up in the first inning with Ray Charles getting a base hit and Stevie Wonder sending one over the center field wall.
