Hour 1: RC Collins expects to be able to deflower America's daughters in exchange for fighting for Americans in Afghanistan. Phil closes talking about a Superbowl party at his house. Hour 2: Margaret Gray has started the "Kim DeLaney Defense Fund" for the NYPD Blue actress. Hour 3: VARIETY.

Hour One: Phil talks about how men hate themselves and no men drink real champagne. Phil takes a call from a guy to let him know G. Gordon Liddy was infuriated on his own show about frivolous law suits and began reading all the law suits of Steve Bosell. Apparently fact checking on the G. Gordon Liddy talk show doesn't exist because he thought Steve Bosell was a real guy. Chris Norton comes in the studio to talk about the fact women treat him like a stud mule because his large male member is very apparent through his pleather pants. Chris takes calls from women. Chris then challenges Phil to whip his out and measure it. Hour Two: RC Collins phones in to talk about a DDR 2000 solo video game. It means a lot to RC because his Dad always shows his love to him in monetary ways. Nevermind the fact RC hans't seen his father in 4 years he knows his father loves him. His father provides a strong moral code for him to live by not like his alcoholic whore mother. Flashback to yesterdays show with the angry elderly caller yelling at Steve and Bobbie Dooley while they have sex on the radio. Hour Three: Dave Oliva is on to warn Chelsea Clinton not to go down the "skank road" the Bush twins have. Flashback to Steve Bosell filing a lawsuit about dogs and cats staring at him while he has sex. Phil then makes more fun of G. Gordon Liddy for being such a huge dumb-ass. Another caller tells Phil radio hosts are biting his material and using it on their show. Show log by George Koutsourais

Hour 1: Margaret Gray is on to discuss how proud she is that Greta Van Sustern has just signed a contract with Fox. She is proud because Greta got the job despite the fact she is hideous and tough on the eyes. Margaret even whispers she thinks Greta maybe be a lesbian, or maybe even a man. Featuring a call from Sylvia who screams at Margaret. Hour 2: Phil talks about the Backstreet boys and various actors/musicians who get drinking habits to promote their career. Phils then talks about bad sportsmanship and bad sports towns like Miami and LA. Hour 3: Larry Grover from Conservatives of Kern county to talk about the fact the Clintons dog was hit by a car and killed in NYC. Larry believes Clinton murdered his dog to get publicity. RC Collins then calls in and gives a Rose Bowl update. The flashback was Bobbie Dooley getting sick and tired of people staying home on New Years Eve. Show log by George Koutsourais

Hour 1: Lloyd Bonafide says SUV drivers and soccer whores are treasonous for consuming Middle East oil, so Lloyd is siphoning gas. A kid rode by on a bike and said "suck it old man!" Phil closes talking about building the website archive, argues with Bud about Nostradamus. Hour 2: RC Collins says that kids want guns for Christmas, and if more kids had guns Columbine wouldn’t have happened. Phil closes talking about how Iwo Jima would compare to now, discusses war perceptions, talks to callers. Hour 3: Joe Dickhead and the Professor with NFL Picks. Phil describes how a drunken Craig Taylor acts at parties, then talks about Lee Hacksaw Hamilton of KFMB. Callers are surprised the show is fake. Phil talks about the Lord of the Rings movie.

Hour 1: Dean Wheeler created “Jesus Dinner” and wants a grant from NEA to help fund his exhibit. He's an artist but puts Jesus in a microwave. Phil closes discussing going to see Erin Brockovich. Hour 2: Jeff Dowder says Taliban defector John Walker was brutally raised in a rich family and had to deal with a lot of crap growing up that way. Phil closes talking about how reporters deal with the family of a fallen war correspondent. Hour 3: Flashback of 2001-12-05b BDO. Art Bell and RC Collins play "Number that Movie".

Hour 1: FIRST HALF. Vernon Dozier is furious over the Aladdin soundtrack because it's patently anti-American. SECOND HALF. Phil talks about the Phil Linton quiz. he offered huge prizes for impossibly hard questions. Hour 2: Bobbie Dooley is charging a woman in her HOA 90 dollars a month who is claiming to be the first to say that the missionaries arrested in Afghistan were dumb and ugly. Phil closes talking about Harry Potter. Hour 3: Phil talks about the show, does RC Collins with Straight Outta Chatsworth, and talks about Howard Hughes and his hygienic compulsions.

Hour 1: FIRST HALF. Phil talks with callers about websites with his name as the domain name. SECOND HALF. Roland Schwinn's Thanksgiving Feast Exhibition. He eats in front of the homeless to encourage them to do better. Hour 2: FIRST HALF. Bobbie Dooley won't eat at a friends house because she thinks the turkey baster was used for insemination. SECOND HALF. Phil commentary, Radio Free Afghanistan with Raj Fahneen. Hour 3: FIRST HALF. Lloyd Bonafide says veterans and RV drivers should not have to use turn signals. SECOND HALF. Commentary, RC Collins calls in.

Hour 1: RC Collins is a military cadet and clarifies some misconceptions that Phil and other civilian callers have about the military and combat. commandant Harvey Wireman appears at 30m. Phil closes laughing about the Taliban National Anthem. Hour 2: FIRST HALF. Phil talks about Afghanistan bombings. SECOND HALF. Bob McGraw is promoting Afghanistan charities to increase his spa business earnings. Hour 3: Bobbie Dooley accidentally shot the pool man and tries to justify it by saying our country is under attack and she might have gotten raped. Phil closes talking about ruining one's credit.

Hour 1: Ted Bell wants Americans to grow a pair of testicles and fly again like him, except he flies private charters. Hour 2: Jeff Dowder, after RC Collins calls and tries to hang up, takes exception to the new terrorist threats against the West Coast. Hour 3: Dean Wheeler and his northern California vigil says Americans need to reconcile their Thanksgiving guilt for "Ganistan" by receiving a hot grease enema from a turkey baster. He takes it from another man one time per year, and says if he was Osama bin Laden he would have done things differently.

Hour 1: FIRST HALF. Bob Green is a Middle East scholar who makes disparaging references about Persian culture (Middle East comedy). SECOND HALF. Phil talks about Afghanistan news. Hour 2: FIRST HALF. RC Collins wants sex before the post-9/11 world ends. He asks women to hook a brother up. Flashback 2001-10-09 hour two. SECOND HALF. Phil talks about Afghanistan and the Taliban. Phil does Osama calling in. Hour 3: FIRST HALF. Steve Bosell says tanning makes you Arabian, and is against those who are tan or are thinking about it. SECOND HALF. Phil talks about post 9-11 news and takes calls.