Tonight it was Doug Dannger, a gay man and a gay journalist, advocating "gay bunkers" in the event of social collapse and chaos. In these, gay men and lesbians would live to insure their survival. What about progeny (children)? Doug said that the gay men would have to "explain to the lesbians where their duty lie."                         Doug Dannger's bunker design Vernon Dozier, while leading a summer school class in stretching exercises, saw one of his testicles fall out of his "short." (Since they are a "pair of shorts" then one leg of them would be a "short") One of the giorls in class saw this and told her parents. Now Vernon is forced to correct the situation. One solution was a series of alarms: a dive alarm, a gong and a horn playing wa-wa-wa.

Tonight, Doug Dannger, a Gay man and a Gay journalist, came on the show to discuss Brittney Spears and a lawsuit that accuses her of having sex in front of her kids, among other things. Doug told Phil that if Ms. Spears wanted to have sex in front of her kids there must be a reasonable explanation for it. One woman called to complain that Doug kept telling people he was gay. She had gay friends and they didn't have to say anything. Doug asked her "Then how did you know they were gay? I say it so you'll know. I'm not sneaking around trying to hide it like your hairdresser." In hour two it was Father James McQuarters saying that Christianity had lost the battle to Islam. Because of the "hayseed" image of southern Christians, like Terry Jones and his Koran burning, more and more "quality white men are leaving the Christian church and joining the Muslamics."

On tonight's show, University of Washington engineering professor Don Micksa tells Phil that by accident, when calling a friend of his, he got on the line with his friends 20 year old daughter, a woman he had seen and admired on campus. Because he has a "Jack Friday-sounding voice" the young lady asked him if he was a cop. Don decided to lie and say he was, a "Faran Benton of the Seattle police." They are 8 months into their relationship now and Faran....I mean....Don wonders if he should tell her who he really is before they sleep together or after. He may be using her, yes, but she may be using him to get some parking tickets fixed. We then brought on the line Doug Dannger of the Orange County Courier. Doug, a "gay man and gay journalist" believes that Whoopi Goldberg walked off The View the other day because Bill O'Reilly provoked her into doing it. O'Reilly, says Doug, hates blacks because he's an Irish-American and Irish-Americans have carried around their resentment of blacks since Civil War days when the Irish didn't want to go to war to free black people. Doug says it's in O'Reilly's DNA to look in the mrror and see himself as a monkey wearing a derby and sipping from a whiskey bottle while Whoopi is "Abe Lincoln's own black woman."

Tonight we opened with Doug Dannger, Orange County Courier reporter and "gay man and gay journalist." He talked with Phil about the passing of actor James McArthur and the "racism of Hawaii Five-O." As Doug sees it, because the primary Asian group in Hawaii is (or was) Japanese there should have been Japanese actors and Japanese characters on the show, not Chinese as was the case with Kam Fong playing Chin-Ho. The same is true of the current Hawaii Five-O with Koreans playing Polynesians. Doug said the whole audience is complicit in this racism. "This is the same as the entire cast of the Cosbys being replaced with coal-black Cubans and nobody saying anything!" Doug said the reason why people weren't calling right away is because he smoked TV viewers racism out and they were hiding. Father James McQuarters of Belmar Academy joined Phil to get it said about the Maura Kelly column on "gross fat people kissing" on TV and the reaction it created on the set of TV's Mike and Molly and across the country. "Of course it makes us sick to look at fat people kissing....but you don't come out and say it!" Father McQuarters said they hang a sheet in the school gym behind which fat kids can go and dance and hug and do it away from the view of other people. He even works fat kids out by having them do deep knee bends "holding a crucifix, hewn from heavy wood, across their shoulders. It reminds them of what I go through trying to get the fat off their asses. Frankly it also reminds me of what I go through."