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Friday, August 11, 2000

Hour 1:Travel agent Colleen Kristen Brewster urges Phil's listeners not to make the huge mistake of trying to book their own vacations. Phil talks about flying.Hour 2:Phil speaks with Chris Norton who will be at the Democratic Convention to meet liberal women more likely to share in his sexuality. Phil talks about Bill Clinton.Hour 3:Jay Santos of the Citizens Auxiliary police joins the program to talk about next weeks Democratic Nation Convention and what measures they'll be taking to make sure the streets are free of protest.

Wednesday, August 23, 2000

Hour 1:Gay journalist Doug Dannger warns that if Richard Hatch doesn't win Survivor then gay people across the country will riot. Phil explains why Combover Boy is a thief.Hour 2:"The Tribe Has Spoken" Bob McGraw joins the program, he is manufacturing and selling "Corn Rat" inspired by the Survivor TV show. Bob says 50% of proceeds will go charity but he's not exactly sure which ones. Phil explains how swearing can sometimes get oHour 3:Publishers Clearing House winner Viola Newberry calls the program to complain that she's receiving pornographic magazines in the mail. Attorney Harvey Wireman claims that his client Chris Norton had a right to e-mail revealing photos of himself to women a

Monday, December 13, 2004

Monday, December 13, 2004 Hour 1: Chris Norton thinks the courts should have talked first with the other women who didn't mind being dumped by Scott Peterson. Hour 2: Holiday cooking skit. Phil thinks about disappearing. Jim Hunt's travel show. Phil on CD printing problem, guys strutting at event, email. Gary Snail Computer Show. Phil on spam. Jim Rome Show. Hour 3: David G Hall wonders why Phil sounds so down. Senior Chat with Harvey Wireman. Phil on Motley Crue reunion. Phil on growing archive and FCC problem.

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Hour One:The show started off with "The Further Adventures of Bill Cortizen." He's a football coach for the Chattanooga Choo-Choos and the owner and her son are idiots who basically make his life a living, tongue biting hell. Tsunami Sam showed up to sing a blues tribute to Condoleezza Rice. The Art Bell and General Johnson Jameson try and contact Cupid in the 6th Dimension. Phil played a tape of the real Art Bell talking with a caller about Phil's show and then Phil wrapped the hour answering e-mails about his move to Extra Sports AM 570.Hour Two:Bobbi and Steve Dooley come on to talk about the HOA meeting they had at Western Estates. Bobbi was mortified to find out that the homeowners were more interested in the well-being of a child that was sexually assaulted near their community than they were in how her hemorrhoid surgery went. Bobbi tells Phil that while the little girl is alright, Bobbi is still bleeding a little bit. We then rolled a listener flashback request of Chris Norton doing his stupid sex dance. Jeff Dowder called and talked about his dog giving him the evil eye because the dog apparently doesn't want America cutting any deals with Korea and turning him and his canine brothers into stew meat.Hour Three:Dean Wheeler, an assistant gymnastics coach from Northern California has to answer some tough questions from Phil and his callers on why he has years and years of videotape stored with images of teenage girls jumping up and down on trampolines. Dean says they are simply training tapes that show the development of athletes, even though some of the girls are in short skirts doing leg kicks. Phil's cell phone rings in the middle of the bit....and the dumbass answers it. Then RC Collins, a cadet at Bradley Military Academy calls to ask women to simply come out and state how much he and his fellow cadets have to spend on a Valentines date to insure they'll get sex. He says "just give us a number we can work with." Phil finishes off with some more e-mail.

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Hour One:Phil hot the air last night as "Brian Grant" of the LA Lakers and took calls from Lakers fans who wouldn't know Brian Grant from Lou Grant. For a solid hour "Brian" kept talking about Vlade Divac coming into the locker room eating a fistful of goat cheese like an apple and how Kobe is moving to his own dressing cubicle so talking to him will be like talking to a guy in a different toilet stall. Phil then went on to bust the act and explain it was him when some gang-banger from East LA started talking crap to "Brian" in order to show how dumb the guy was. After that, it was on as the whole dumb gang world started calling with threats...then magically stopped when Phil slowly explained the show....again. Oh My God.Hour Two:Phil brought on Bobbi Dooley to explain to new listeners who she was. Then Bud interrupted to tell Phil there was a guy outside who wanted to buy airtime on Phil's show named Dick Little. When Phil asked Bud what the guy was selling, Bud said Viagra. David Hall came on and both he and Bud didn't get the connection. All David knew is it was money for the show. Hal and Viola called from their plane to tell Phil they were going to Laughlin again and ask if he wanted them to put some money on a number at the Roulette wheel. Phil kept saying 16 Red but Viola couldn't hear him over the plane engine. When she finally was able to get Hal to "turn the plane down" and hear Phil, they stalled out and never did get Phil's number. We then ran a listener flashback request and then Lloyd Bonifide came back on to finish his audition for American Idol by singing "Hungry Heart" and rapping through the middle of it about how he hopes Bruce Springsteen is crippled for life in a limo accident because of his stance on the Iraq war. Steve Bosell then came on and explained who he was for new listeners.Hour Three:Father James McQuarters kicked off our third hour by saying if the Pope dies, he'd like to "throw his hat in the ring." When Phil points out the fact that the Father has various child molestation charges in his history, McQuarters says he'll "spread some juice around and grease the right palms." Phil then talks about the new "Show Lines" feature on the web page and Harvey Weirman, who quit his Law Talk feature because he was butchering words so bad the name Michael Jackson came out to sound like "Miggelee Boo-Boo," comes on to try his hand at entertainment reporting. In this segment he talks about the new Clint Eastwood film Million Dollar Baby," only his eyes are so bad he thinks it says "Mummy Baby." Then Chris Norton comes on to talk about who he is for our new listeners. Phil reads about the FCC getting slapped down in a federal court and then Vernon Dozier, the football coach closes the show. As Margaret Grey is reciting the shows credits, Bud calls her a whore and she beats him with the phone.

Monday, March 14, 2005

Hour One:David G. Hall and Dr. Jim Sadler come on the show to discuss the difference between a woman being sexually harassed by a husbands boss and when the said boss is simply groping innocently. The innocent grope, according to Dr. Sadler, may do a man's career a world of good if he can just sit back and watch it happening in a relaxed mood as if he is "looking at a sunset."Hour Two:Father James McQuarters talks about the current Lent season and how its tough "eating, sleeping and crapping a particular sermon for weeks" and then delivering it on a Sunday when there are mentally disabled people in the congregation and hearing them make loud mooing and squealing sounds. He proposes gagging them with a rag or tape.Hour Three:Darren Flew on Pet Talk interviews a cat named Ruffles that is currently living in a "cat rescue shelter." Ruffles says he was much happier out in the alley nailing every female in heat. He says the day some old lady comes into the shelter to "rescue" him and take him home, he'll go for her face. Phil then mentions how sad it is the know Heineken is going to make a "low-carb" beer. We then play a listener flashback featuring Chris Norton and how you can't really prosecute a teacher for having sex with her student....if she's hot. Then, it's the Comb-Over Boy Show. 'Boy is talking about how embarrassing it was being on the same panel as Phil at the R&R convention last Thursday and having Phil wipe the floor with him. Pederast-turned-News Commentator Herb Sewell comes on with his Michael Jackson Report and then its Buds Most Radical NASCAR Accidents, recapping the UAW-Daimler/Chrysler 400 in 'Vegas.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Hour 1:Father James McQuarters is on to discuss a family in his church who won the 120 million dollar lottery. His belief is that he should give the church it's fair share. But how fair is it to ask them to give up 500,000 dollars? Tune in to see what the audience thinks of Father McQuarters idea!Hour 2:Chris Norton is on to discuss his latest idea : How to please your wife like you still a single man. His theory is if you leave magazines out, detailing your sexual interests that may do the trick. Tune in to this hour to hear what the female listener thinks.Hour 3:Phil plays a flashback called Water polo featuring Vernon Dozier from 5/19/05. Lloyd Bonafide calls in to comment on Elliot Ness. He claims he machine gunned Canadians. What do you think?

Monday, November 21, 2005

Hour 1:Phil opens the show discussing www.sweetfeatheryjesus.com, a fan forum for the show. Phil plays a flashback called "Sing Radio with Barry Brazier." Bob Bakian calls in to tell Phil he is flying over Hollywood. He says he saw Bono leave in an ambulance and assumes he's headed to a mental hospital. Beau Gibson is on tonight with his show Gibson On The Line. He is discussing Gary Glitter and how he got busted for having sex with a 12 year old child in Vietnam.Hour 2:Don Berman joins Phil to discuss his Thanksgiving teen night. See what happens when Don discusses his idea for a perfect Thanksgiving, and how he plans to celebrate with the teens.Hour 3:Chris Norton calls in to discuss with Phil about NogLip. He warns all of the listeners about drinking it over the holidays and believes it might make you look gay. R.C. Collins and Vernon Dozier call-in to have Phil join their roundtable about Harry Potter. See what happens when Vernon tells R.C. he loves Harry Potter.

Wednesday, December 7, 2005

Hour 1:Chris Norton, a pharmaceutical rep, is organizing a free speech at work movement. He was honest with a co-worker when she brought her baby to work to show everyone. He said the kids face looked "pinched in." This co-worker decided to have her desk moved to another part of the building.Hour 2:Don Berman from the Channel 19 news room is on to talk about new, stringent FCC guidelines being proposed for broadcasters. He says they are welcome in light of the fact they protect children from indecent or improper material.Hour 3:Herb wrote a book about what President Bush is really like when the cameras are off…and thinks it is amazing that Americans really believe him to be a religious man.

Monday, December 12, 2005

Hour 1:Bobbie Dooley is on with Phil to promote "Toys for our Tots." She is asking for donations for their children. Tune in to see just how far Bobbie is willing to go for her kids at Western Estates.Hour 2:Phil discusses the CD signing in Arcadia and the fans he met. Phil plays a flashback from 10-03-03 called "Bosell and Limbaugh". See what happens when General Jamison discovers what eggnog really is. Entrepreneur Chris Norton has a new business he calls "Project Mile High Club."Hour 3:Larry Grover is on with Phil to discuss his recent arrest. See what happens when he tells the listeners he tried to have an escort accompany him to a function. Mavis Leonard joins Phil to discuss Tookie Williams. She used to baby-sit him as a child.

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